yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
