now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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