Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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