go do what you do best...puke behind churches
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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