Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize