She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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