I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
