either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
