Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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