So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
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