HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
