were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
