is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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