i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
