Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
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