i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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