im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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