So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
the liver wants what the liver wants
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
