Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
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