i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
smell my finger.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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