weddingsv make me drug and hornr
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
