their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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