I looked at my own cervix.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Randomize
