i permit you to call me
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
