Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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