Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Verdict: uncircumcised.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize