I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
