dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
