I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
