i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
