I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize