in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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