i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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