Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
