Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
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