Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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