best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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