I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
