he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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