he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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