I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Randomize
