absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
