There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize