anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
