Yo dont text me then not text me
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I have feelings that need drinking.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize