Don't you send me to vm
Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
