this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
ok first of all what the fuck
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
