Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
