like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
