What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
